RACK 'EM UP.
Those Shawn Kemp illegitimate kids jokes are old school. Calvin Murphy is the new hotness.
Or even Karl Malone, who unbelievably got a 13-year-old girl pregnant when he was a sophomore at Lousiana Tech. That child did alright for himself, as hewas drafted by the Buffalo Bills in 2008. Demetrius Bell spilled the beans on how Malone had ignored him his whole life. Karl Malone also has another illegitimate daughter who plays in the WNBA. That is some powerful stuff, huh?
FROM faniq.com:
ATHLETES WITH ILLEGITIMATE KIDS
THE HEAVYWEIGHTS
Calvin Murphy - 14 illegitimate kids by 9 women. You sir are our current champion.
Travis Henry - 9 kids by 9 women. All of this by 28. Impressive. He is on pace to catch Calvin. The fact that he's broke from paying child support may slow him down though.
Ex-San Antonio Spur Willie Anderson - 9 illegitimate kids. If only his field goal percentage had been as high as his impregnation rate.
Evander Holyfield - 9 illegitimate kids. Has more kids than brain cells left.
Jason Caffey - 8 kids by 7 women.
UPDATE - Shawn Kemp - 7 illegitimate kids by 6 women last time. Supposedly up to 11 kids by 9 women now. Gives his nickname of the Reign Man new meaning. Might also explain why he nearly played with an Italian team late in 2008.
Derrick Thomas - 7 illegitimate kids by 5 women. He died at 33. Let's just leave it at that.
UNCONFIRMED - Dominique Wilkins - reportedly played so long in the NBA because, according to a Magic front office employee, he was paying money on 20 paternity suits. Any further confirmation would be awesome.
THE MIDDLEWEIGHTS
NEW MEMBER - Scott Skiles - At least 6 kids, possibly more.
Ray Lewis - 6 kids by 4 women.
Marshall Faulk - 6 kids by 3 women. Which is probably why he considered coming out of retirement.
Larry Johnson (basketball) - 5 kids by 4 women. 3 are illegitimate.
Charles Rogers - Uber-NFL Draft bust reportedly has 5 illegitimate kids...and no paycheck. Definitely the makings of a solid family.
Vlad Guerrero - 4 kids by 4 women.
Oscar De La Hoya - 4 kids (courtesy of Fark)
Santonio Holmes - 3 illegitimate kids by two women, before leaving college.
Former Celtic Greg Minor - 3 illegitimate kids.
Ricky Williams - 3 illegitimate kids. Maybe that's why he smokes so much weed.
Priest Holmes - 3 illegitimate kids. You best keep running Priest.
Chad Johnson - Has 3 illegitimate kids.
Mike Bibby - apparently had two before leaving 'Zona.
THE LIGHTNING FAST GROUP
Willis McGahee - 3 illegitimate kids in 2 years in Buffalo. Not a lot to do in Buffalo, except make babies. Lots and lots of babies. Not sure what he's done since in Baltimore, but I can take a guess.
Shannon "Horseface" Sharpe - 3 as well. Supposedly had those three all in one year.
THE GUYS YOU WOULDN'T EXPECT GROUP
Dwight Howard
Walter Herrmann
Peja Stojakovic
Wizards Coach Eddie Jordan
NHL player Daniel Alfredsson
NHL player Richard Zednik
Mike Miller
Marvin Harrison
Tracy McGrady
NEW MEMBER - Keith Van Horn
THE FAMOUS OLD GUYS GROUP
Steve Garvey - 2 illegitimate kids by 2 women.
Dr. J - 2 illegitimate kids by 2 women. I actually met one of them.
Larry Bird
Isiah Thomas
Jim Palmer
Darryl Strawberry
Pete Rose
Tug McGraw
THE GETTING A HEAD START GROUP
Gary Sheffield - Had 2 illegitimate kids by age 17. Added a few more later on in life.
NEW MEMBER - Tom Gordon - Former relief pitcher had three illegitimate kids by age 17.
THE THAT'S JUST WRONG GROUP
Elijah Dukes - Impregnated a 17-year-old foster child. Also has 4 more illegitimate kids - making him a middleweight as well.
NEW MEMBER - Karl Malone - Got a 13-year-old girl pregnant. Also possibly the world's worst dad.
THE QB KIDS GROUP
Matt Leinart - already has one, my guess is he's working hard on another.
Tom Brady - the dream baby will one day rule the NFL.
KEEP YOUR EYE ON THIS GUY GROUP
Noel Devine - He's not an official member yet because he's not a pro. He's just a sophomore at West Virginia. But he had 2 illegitimate kids in high school, and possibly more. Keep it going Noel, a good start, but you've got a long way to go.
GUYS WITH AT LEAST ONE ILLEGITIMATE KID
NEW MEMBER - Larry Fitzgerald
NEW MEMBER - Michael Turner
Antawn Jamison
Chipper Jones
DeShawn Stevenson
Cliff Floyd
Mark Messier
Brian Urlacher
Rae Carruth - Yes, he fathered an illegitimate kid before the incident where he had his pregnant girlfriend gunned down.
Juan Gonzalez
Andre Rison
David Justice
Andruw Jones
Alonzo Spellman
Dave Meggett
Gary Payton - From a reader: The best part about Gary Payton is that his illegitimate kid is named "Gary Payton, Jr." so that when his wife (or whatever) had a kid, and he wanted a junior, he couldn't do it without major confusion, so he named his legitimate kid "Gary Payton II."
Stephon Marbury
Jason Kidd
Allen Iverson
Latrell Sprewell
Juwan Howard
Kenny Anderson
Scottie Pippen
Hakeem Olajuwon
Patrick Ewing
Randy Johnson
By: Jimmy Smith
No comments:
Post a Comment