Brady Quinn for... President

Brady Quinn has not played all that much for the Browns but there is a lot of hope and promise surrounding him. But little, experience, the same things that McCain and Palin call  Obama out for. 

So here is a video of the "promised one" Quinn and the "proven one" Joe Thomas supporting John McCain.

I won't get into the politics because I like to avoid that stuff. But McCain apparently doesn't know sports either.

According to Deadspin.com "At the end, McCain tells Quinn 'Good luck this Sunday.'"

Does he know they play... Monday... against the Giants?

Here is a different video of the speech and at the 3:22 mark is the quote in question.

Thanks to youtube user iamacrazyturtle for the video.


That hug looks really uncomfortable.

Photo courtesy of the Plain Dealer

By Jimmy Smith

Weekly Top 4 "T"s

Tuesday starts with T, you know what else starts with T…

1. The Minnesota Wild are genetic biologists

The Minnesota Wild unveiled their franchise’s first mascot today, and Charles Darwin would be pleased.

Its name… Nordy. So what would the Wild mascot look like in your head? Okay, now add an entirely different animal.

“He looks a little like a bear and a little like a fox, but the team won't say exactly what kind of animal he is. They call him a hybrid of several wild animals.”

Nordy wears the number 18,001 and fittingly sports a mullet and has an “I was really trashed and my friends wrote on my head” green "M" on his forehead.

Hell, e-mail Nordy at nordy@wild.com. Why not?

2. Tennessee Vols’ Running back Arian Foster really loves Land of The Lost

Despite the team’s horrible start, Foster is in demand for media interviews because he is on the verge of becoming UT’s all-time leading rusher. Foster is just 347 yards away from the mark.

Simple enough, now what seems to be the problem?

Arian had a demand: whoever interviewed him had to speak Pterodactyl, some made-up dinosaur language.

No interview was conducted.

3. Trump helps sell Jets’ tickets by playing pretend

Donald Trump in a flamboyant white fur coat.

"Who were you expecting, Joe Namath?"

4. Too bad Luke Walton can’t attract the right girl

A woman has been charged with stalking Luke Walton of the Los Angeles Lakers.

Stacy Elizabeth Beshear of El Segundo was arrested Sept. 18 after she pulled up to his car and pretended to fire gunshots at him with her hand.

Ladies he is taken anyway. See.


Walton said Beshear has been harassing him since late last year. He said that she would wait for him outside of his home in Manhattan Beach. Beshear went as far as to write on his car with a marker after he refused to sign an autograph.

Who wants a Luke Walton autograph anyway? She is crazy.

Luke did offer this advice to all of those who have been followed by crazy people pushing empty baby strollers outside of their house at all hours of the night.

Run!

“When we were interacting, I could tell by the stuff she was saying that she's not all there in the head -- which makes me feel bad for her.

"At the same time, most people who go on killing sprees are people who aren't all there in the head."

Why doesn't Lebron have this problem?

I really just wanted to use that picture.

By: Jimmy Smith

The economy is REALLY BAD

When Bucky Dent and Mike Torrez sqaure off in Mario Super Sluggers on the Nintendo Wii. This had to be for money... had to be.

Reliving the old Red Sox and Yankees rivalry as Bowser and Mario.

Again proving that the Nintendo Wii is a half-decent workout, especially when you have done nothing in 30 years, check out the sweat blob on Torrez's tummy grow and grow as he gets his ass handed to him.

Obviously Bucky whoops his grand kids in this game. Either that or he is on HGH, you be the judge.

By: Jimmy Smith

I Told Myself I Wouldn't Do This...

100 years was just too storybook of a finish. The Cubs were swept after having the best record in the NL.

If its any consolation, the Angels narrowly escaped the same fate.

But that is not good enough for a Cubs' fan. Now imagine if the White Sox come back and win....

I'm not going to bore you with stats and all that. It was an epic failure. Buying Rich Harden like they did and the season that they had should have yielded more.

But remember, the Dodgers were not pushovers.

Manny in the playoffs is the real deal.

Here is the prediction, MANNY thrashes the Red Sox in the World Series.

That Dodgers lineup is pretty good.

By: Jimmy Smith

NFL Week 5 Fantasy Start 'em/ Sit 'em

Jonathan Hartman

Well, I’ve been having a tough time with predicting these things. I say play Favre against San Diego, and he does nothing. But the next week, he throws for six touchdowns. So, I’m telling you to do the opposite of whatever I say, but that’s assuming I can predict my own wrong predictions.
(Although I’m not too good at predictions, as previously stated)

Start ‘em
Jay Cutler- DEN QB (vs. TB)– After throwing for 361 yards in a losing effort, look for Cutler to be impressive against Tampa Bay. It should be a high scoring game, so Cutler will definitely get his opportunities to rack up fantasy points.

Plus, he’s on my fantasy team, which has to be a good thing, right?

Sit ‘em
Kansas City fans- (@ CAR) – Sorry Kansas City fans, but don’t get too optimistic for that second victory of the year. Your team looked really good last week against Denver; however, it’s probably just a fluke. Carolina (3-1) is a good team. Basically, don’t get your hopes up KC and instead open a bag of chips.

Jimmy Smith

Start ‘em
Steve Slaton- HOU RB (vs. IND) – The Colts are allowing 199.3 rushing yards per game and three rushing touchdowns this year. Slaton started his first game in Week 3 and ran for 116 yards and a touchdown at Tennessee. The Titans boast one of the best defenses in the NFL. He followed that up with 116 total yards and a touchdown against another solid defense at Jacksonville.

Sit ‘em
Ben Roethlisberger- PIT QB (@ JAX) – With Willie Parker (knee) and Rashard Mendenhall (shoulder) out, and Roethlisberger's shoulder is still a concern this offenses is going to be a shell of its normal self. He has yet to pass for 200 yards this year and has one touchdown and two interceptions in his past two games. In the game against the Jags last year Roethlisberger was sacked 11 times in two games.

YIKES.

NFL Week 5 Pick 'em

Fantasy becomes reality

Fantasy football is an extreme past time that has grown in popularity. You pick your favorite players and watch football games that you would not normally watch. Its that easy.

But when your team does poorly. You become a murderous wreck.

"When deputies arrived, Ward admitted to being upset over points from his fantasy football league and that he asked his roommate to move out of the residence. Because the roommate was ignoring him, Ward told the deputies that he pulled out his knife and cut the book as a joke."

Oh crap Tom Brady is out for the year. I'll cut you.



But if you let Jesus draft you, you cannot lose.

By: Jimmy Smith

Weekly Top 4 "T"s

Sorry its late:

Tuesday starts with T, you know what else starts with T…

1. “Tweak”

Greg Oden is back to basketball after missing last season after a knee surgery. Day one of Trail Blazers practice and like clock work, Oden rolled his ankle.

"Tweaked his ankle," Blazers head coach Nate McMillan said. "He's fine. No problem with that.”

Its not a big deal, except his career has yet to start and he already is looking like he is made of paper.

But look at that face, how could you not love him, or that puppy of his.


At least Portland has something to be proud of…


2. The Boston Globe and “wiener” references

I did not know that the Patriots had anymore backup quarterbacks.

But they do, this is Kevin O’Connell and he has a situation.

The Boston Globe ran this picture on Sunday. Looks okay to me…

Look again.


Looks like its apology time.

From The Boston Globe:
Editor’s note: A photo on Page C6 in Sunday’s Sports section showed Patriots rookie quarterback Kevin O’Connell wearing a wristband with inappropriate language written on it. The photo did not meet the Globe’s journalistic standards and should not have been published.

3. Travis Henry aspires to be Pablo Escobar just like Vinny Chase

Allegedly, Travis Henry was involved in a cocaine deal. He was arrested Tuesday by the DEA.

Authorities said it was a "multi-kilogram cocaine transaction” in the Denver suburb of Centennial.

I couldn’t find a mug-shot, this will do.


This stuff just writes itself half of the time. Thank god for the NFL, it makes my job so much easier. Actually thank god for the Bengals…

4. Three times a loser


Oh, there is the mug-shot I needed. But that is some one who only wishes the were Travis Henry (or Vice Versa, its hard to tell anymore).

Cedric Benson, almost in a storybook turn of events, was signed by the Cincinnati Bengals.

DeDe Dorsey hurt his hamstring on Sunday against Cleveland and looks to be done for the season. So, obviously you sign Cedric Benson, right Bengals.

So much for that clean-up act by cutting Chris Henry, because you quickly resigned him and gave him a friend. Losers travel in herds, remember that.

OPEN YOUR EYES CHRIS!

By: Jimmy Smith

Holy Mother of God, Watch This

NFL Week 4 Pick 'em

NFL Week 4 Fantasy Start 'em/ Sit 'em

Jonathan Hartman

Start ‘em
Cincinnati’s passing game (vs. CLE) – After finally showing signs of life last week against the NY Giants in a losing effort, the Bengals get to face Cleveland at home this week. Cleveland made the Ravens’ quarterback Joe Flacco look like Montana with a 13-out-of-19 passing performance last week. Look for the Carson Palmer to do much more this Sunday.

Sit ‘em
Donovan McNabb- QB- (@ CHI) – Nothing against McNabb or Philadelphia, far from it. They played great last week against Pittsburgh. It’s just that Chicago’s defense will respond after a horrible game last week, giving up 407 passing yards against Tampa Bay. Chicago’s defense has shown their ability to stop a high powered passing game during week one against the Colts. Look for Chicago to do the same against McNabb this Sunday at Soldier Field.

Jimmy Smith

Start ‘em
Jamal Lewis- RB- (@ CIN) – Last year Lewis went for 48 carries for 308 yards and a touchdown and five catches for 42 yards in two games against the Bengals. Cincinnati is allowing 174 rushing yards and four rushing touchdowns this season.

Sit ‘em
Drew Brees- QB- (vs. SF) – He just lost he biggest remaining receiving threat in Jeremy Shockey (hernia) along with Marques Colston. The Saints will be better off running with Reggie Bush. San Francisco has done well against Arizona, Seattle and Detroit in pass defense, coming in with only two touchdowns allowed and four interceptions. The 49ers run defense is not as good, so the Saints will try to move the ball on the ground with Bush and Pierre Thomas.

Tip of the Hat / Wag of the Finger

Stealing a play out of Stephen Colbert’s arsenal, I now break down the Oregon State upset over USC. Final score USC 21 and Oregon State 27.


A Tip of the Hat to…
Jacquizz Rodgers (RB – Oregon State) – 37 carries, 186 yards rushing, 2 touchdowns
The 5’6”, 180 pound freshman running back made the supposed best defense in college football look silly. Rodgers ate up clock and converted key first downs with his speed and surprising power. Rodgers shook off defenders and ultimately shook up the BCS picture.


The Oregon State offensive line
In front of every great rushing performance, there is an offensive line that came ready to play. Additionally, the majority of Oregon State’s rushing yards came in between the tackles, which shows the offensive lines’ influence on the game.

The Oregon State defense
The defense held USC to 86 total rushing yards and held USC quarterback Mark Sanchez to 18-of-29 passing. Not to mention intercepting a Sanchez pass and returning it to the two-yard line, setting up a Rodgers rushing touchdown.

A Wag of the Finger to…

The Oregon State students
After Oregon State went up 27 to 14 with 2:30 left in the fourth quarter, Oregon State students started jumping over the railings and congregating behind the Oregon State bench. I am all for rushing the field, celebrating, etc. However, wait until the game actually ends! That is way too much time left on the clock, especially in the Pac 10 where crazy things happen to end games, like bands on the field or questionable celebration calls. In fact, USC marched down and scored a touchdown before the end, not that it ultimately mattered.

The premature Gatorade bath
Following the students lead, some Oregon State players gave their head coach Mike Riley a Gatorade bath. The problem, there was over two minutes left on the clock. Riley yelled at his players, and rightfully so, got to wait until the final buzzer.

The entire USC team
After a dominate performance against Ohio State, USC came out flat and unmotivated. It did not even look like the same team. What does this say about Ohio State? I don’t even know.

By: Jonathan Hartman

Tennessee Can Never Shake 'Coon Stereotype

Pat Summit had a surgery thats' cause kinda flew under the radar. Its Tennessee, so use your imagination.


My guess is that it flew under the news and blog radar so because the injury was beyond laughable and the coach wanted to avoid the obvious headlines.

Tennessee basketball coach Pat Summitt had the shoulder surgery because of a run-in she had with a raccoon.

The winningest basketball coach in NCAA history had problems with her right shoulder after dislocating it while defending her dog as a raccoon was poised to attack.

This happened all the way back in March, just a few days before the SEC tournament.

Summitt had arthroscopic surgery Thursday in Knoxville.

Smokey doesn't mind a 'coon though.

By: Jimmy Smith

Now the Lions can win the Super Bowl

Matt Millen is out in Detroit.

The oft-scorned Lions team president and chief executive officer has left the position, his wife told ESPN's Chris Mortensen.

The Lions are 31-84 under Millen. But until this point, the Lions have not listened to the demands from fans that wanted Millen out of town.


Have the Lions' fans used all their energy getting rid of Millen that they won't give the new guy a chance. Its Detroit, so the answer is:


Millen let the boxes do the talking.


By: Jimmy Smith

Braves for hire

Thanks to the guys over at braveslaunchpad.com

“The plan had the Braves forfeiting all but two games to Philadelphia while doing everything in their power to stop, in particular, the late season insurgence of the New York Mets.

Investigations heated up after the Braves won their last two series with the Mets in a week that saw the Phillies finalize a 9-0 sweep of the Braves at Turner Field.”

Funny post by the boys. My only question is do the Braves think the Falcons are so bad that they need take a bribe for Eagles tickets and cheese steaks?

After actually thinking about it, yeah they do.

By: Jimmy Smith

For the Browns, its an easy Ten-Step program

Step One: Draft “Future QB”

Step Two: Start schmuck QB

Step Three: Get Lucky

Step Four: Pay schmuck to star status

Step Five: “Star” gets hurt

Step Six: “Star” sucks and so does team

Step Seven: Tease fans with a chance that “Future QB” could play

Step Eight: Don’t play him

Step Nine: Lose all hope

Step Ten: Repeat


By: Jimmy Smith

Weekly Top 4 "T"s

Tuesday starts with T, you know what else starts with T…

1. Texas Tech Speed Dating

Texas Tech football coach Mike Leach was asked for dating advice from a TTU freshman. And candidly, he helped a brother out.



The only quote you need to remember:

“And then, if it’s a huge night and you’re really having a good time, then you can trade computer schemes. And emails and all that mischief people are up to nowadays which I know nothing about.”

2. Trent Green and the football field, friends again

After going 0-3 to start the season, the St. Louis Rams have benched quarterback Mark Bulger. Trent Green will start on Sunday against the Buffalo Bills.

He just got feeling back in his hands. So we will see about this. After all, only the stars in the NFL are getting hurt.

3. The Girl Next… to the Eagles Wide receiver

Girl Next Door Two Dollar Whore, Kendra Wilkinson, addressed her relationship with Eagles receiver Hank Baskett. She said that she and Hank are just friends and are not engaged… using Myspace.com like normal attention whores.



And I quote:
“hiiiiii just wanna let yall know that i am not engaged! if i was id be very happy though n i wouldnt hide it..hahahahaha!!!!! rumors are sooooooooo fuckin funny. yaa trickk yaaaaaa lololol!! Love is a beautiful thing n i think the world needs more of it. lol..”

4. Toot toot, blah blah, Brady Quinn

John Clayton hates it when Josh Elliot calls during “me time.” 

Thank god for “Live” SportsCenters. 


Brady Quinn is lurking, but that’s not all that is lurking.

Asking about Derek Anderson makes me gassy too.

By: Jimmy Smith

NFL Week 3 Pick 'em

NFL Week 3 Fantasy Start 'em/ Sit 'em

Jonathan Hartman

Start ‘em
Brett Favre QB- NYJ (vs. SD) – Favre called this weeks game against San Diego a must win. It’s debatable if that’s true, but either way that’s encouraging for fantasy stats. Not to mention, San Diego’s secondary has given up 247 and 350 passing yards in weeks one and two. Add in the questionable status of LaDainian Tomlinson and the referee debacle from last week, and everything is in place for a Favre blowout game.

Sit ‘em
John Kitna QB- DET (vs. SF) – It’s been a long first two weeks for Kitna, and week three doesn’t look much better. Nothing has been clicking for the Lion’s passing game, and it probably won’t start against a 49ers’ defense that held Matt Hasselbeck to 189 passing yards last Sunday. Look for San Francisco to win big at home.

Jimmy Smith

Start ‘em
Julius Jones RB- SEA (vs STL) – New face in a new place. The Seahawks passing game is that bad. The additions of Keary Colbert and Koren Robinson help, but not all that much. But the Rams’ secondary is Swiss and should allow Matt Hasselbeck a chance to carve them up, which in turn, will allow Jones some space. He ran for 127 yards and a touchdown on 27 carries against the 49ers.

Sit ‘em
Both Cincinnati’s primary receivers (vs. NYG) – Carson Palmer has had an atrocious start to the 08 campaign. That along with his shoulder last week against the Titans makes for slim pickins’ for Ocho Cinco and Ocho Quatro. Granted Tennessee and Baltimore are good defensive units, Palmer and he receivers have never been on the same page from day one. And the Giants are no pushovers either.

A House Divided

# 4 Florida vs. Tennessee
Saturday
3:30 CBS

I hate Florida. Ok, now its out in the open.

I grew up in Nashville so I am a big fan of Tennessee (and a fair weather fan of Vandy. Hey just being honest)

This is a big game for the Vols because Phil Fulmer's job SHOULD hang in the balance this season.

Not all that much should be put on this game. UT hopes should not be too high after that embarrassing loss to UCLA. Although, Arian Foster is an exciting and steady source of rushing yards and new QB Jonathan Crompton has a huge upside.

So UT shouldn't be seeking a win this weekend. But scaring the Gators is always a great thing.


My girlfriend is the Gators' fan. It makes zero sense because she can't name a single player that has ever played for Florida...ever. I think its a spite thing. All I know is that she likes to do that damn "gator chomp." She uses my agony as a cue for the chomping.


I know that the secondary of the Vols is pretty good. Eric Berry is a premier DB in college football and Rico McCoy is an underrated linebacker in that run stopping core.

I am just worried about the offense other than the running game of Foster and Hardesty. Time to prove yourself Crompton.

But how do the Vols matchup against their most bitter rival, the Gay-tors.

By: Jimmy Smith

What Do You Think Wade?